How can I make the most of the time separated from my spouse?

If you and your spouse have arrived at a point in your marriage where you are questioning your future together, you may decide that a legal separation is the best way to help you get perspective. A separation allows married couples some time apart to assess their lives together and what life would be like if they should choose to divorce.

A legal separation should be more than just time spent apart. It should offer a couple a genuine opportunity to examine their differences and perhaps find a new way forward together. And there are some things you can do during the separation that can help you maximize the benefits of the process.

For example, it is important to set ground rules. You want a mutual understanding about living arrangements, child custody, child support and what to do in emergency situations. You also want to establish whether it is alright to date other people.

And once you establish your rules, you want to maintain some level of communication. To do this, you need to figure out the best means of communicating and the frequency with which you will be in contact. Regular communication is especially important if you want to eventually reconcile with your spouse.

You could also benefit by soliciting the aid of third parties who can give you sound advice about your circumstances. Therapists can offer support, as can rabbis or members of the clergy. An experienced family law attorney could also offer you guidance. An attorney can advise you on the legal ramifications of your separation and be your advocate if you come to the conclusion that a divorce is your best option.